I can’t believe I haven’t posted since Christmas! Honestly, time has moved at lightning speed. At first, I was still in Community Entry (CE) with very little to write about. I started teaching, got closer with people in my community, and dreamt of dairy and hot showers. And then Trump was sworn in and USAID was taken down within a matter of weeks. All of our grants were paused, trainings were cancelled, and no one knew what was coming next. We were all frightened for our jobs (still definitely are, to an extent) and I was worried that posting anything online might draw attention from DOGE. And now suddenly it’s July.
To be clear, the future for Peace Corps is still not certain. DOGE visited headquarters in Washington and massive cuts were made. A few posts have already closed down following DOGE involvement. For a few months, layoffs from the mandated organization wide Reduction In Force (RIF) were successfully blocked by a federal judge, however just last week the Supreme Court ruled that they should move forward with staff cuts. I have no idea what the future holds but I am grateful for every day I get here.
Moving far away from the political turbulence in the US, life here in Southern Africa has been filled with very high highs and very low lows. In February, my cohort met in Lusaka, the capital, for a week of In-Service Training (IST). This marked the end of our CE. I had not seen anyone from my cohort aside those with me in Northern Province since Swear-In in November, so it was great to catch up with people, hear about their villages, share embarrassing stories, and give each other advice. Guided by our wonderful trainers, we brainstormed how to be better teachers, community members, and even tried to find time to purchase items that we couldn’t find outside of Lusaka.
Originally, IST was supposed to be two weeks long and we were expected to bring counterparts from our schools and communities to be part of these discussions. But given that this training took place in the middle of February just after PEPFAR funding was completely frozen, our training was shortened to just one week and we no longer had the funds to bring community counterparts. Peace Corps Zambia is almost entirely PEPFAR funded, with HIV support being an emphasis of our service. The second week of our training would have been entirely on HIV education, however that was of course no longer possible given that moment in politics. It felt strange and sad and quite selfish to tell my community that I was headed to Lusaka and no one was allowed to come with me anymore.
Immediately following IST and the long 14 hour bus ride back to Kasama, I got a kitten! I had seen mice around my house and had been searching for a cat throughout CE, and was so excited to finally get one. Her name is Lila and she is the sweetest, snuggliest cat ever – and she is an excellent hunter. So now, I live in a two-pet household with both a dog and a cat. I wish I could say that Remi and Lila are best friends, but I think it’s more accurate to call them frenemies. Both of them really want to play with each other but they just don’t know how. And i just love having both of them around.
In March, I took one of my weekends at the Provincial house for Women’s Day. Kasama went all out for Women’s Day, hosting Zambia’s president, Hakainde Hichilema (more commonly referred to as HH). HH led the march and gave a speech. Zambia is a deeply patriarchal country, so it was nice to celebrate women together on this day. It did sadden me to hear comments that day claiming that someone can’t be labeled a woman until they have had children, though, and the day was unfortunately marked by constant reminders of how far Zambia still has to come to achieve gender equality.
This was the second International Women’s Day march that I have had the privilege of attending outside of the US. In 2020, just a week before I was sent back to the US due to COVID, I was able to go to the women’s march in Cochabamba, Bolivia. The difference between that march, the ones in the US, and the one I was at in Kasama was stark. In Bolivia, women painted their faces with red handprints, chanting about femicide and demanding to be seen. That was much closer to a protest than a march. Police dressed in riot gear stood on hand and I watched people throw paint at police cars. In the US, the only women’s marches I have been to were those during Trump’s first term. Those were massive, slow moving, but filled with bubbling energy no less. Those were very peaceful and generally calm yet commanding. Zambia’s march was almost militant but in a self aware slightly comedic way. It started hours after it was scheduled, with people lined up in the boiling heat and the sun beating down as we waited for it to begin. Once we started moving, there was an emphasis on order and maintaining rows of 3, which felt somewhat silly given the topic. But then suddenly we would stop marching, and there would be full on dance circles and laughter and fun to be had. We made friends with strangers, sang songs, and bought roadside popsicles.
At this point, Term 1 of teaching was well underway. I was struggling to teach nouns, verbs, and adjectives to my students, some of whom can read and speak full english sentences, others who can’t form letters or do more than greet in english. I have found teaching to be immensely difficult. I wish I could say that it has been as rewarding as it has been frustrating, but the reality is that has not been the case. Many days I still feel somewhat lost, and at least 10% of my students do too. My school had the lowest pass rate in our district on the grade 7 national exams last year. Out of 89 students, only 7 passed. Those 7 students transferred to other schools and so my school does not have an 8th grade this year. Literacy levels are very low, yet curriculum expectations remain high. The national exams, taken in grades 7, 9, and 12, are written completely in English. This means that students must both be literate, and also be proficient in English. I teach grades 4, 5, and 6, each with over 50 students. When I teach grade 4, I focus entirely on teaching them how to read. Peace Corps gave us many tools for teaching literacy, including a 3 book series called the Learning to Read Toolkit. It works through the alphabet letter by letter using creative and fun ways for students to grasp concepts. The grade 4 students love it, and some are starting to break through.
For my grade 5s and grade 6s, I have to teach content in order for them to have any chance at passing the exam in grade 7. I have been focusing a lot on reading comprehension. Even for the students who can read, they struggle to understand and analyze what is in front of them. Then, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, my counterpart and I host literacy and reading clubs. On Tuesdays, we cover basic phonics for the most illiterate students. On Thursdays, I hand out picture books for them to practice reading with, and sit with students one by one for 5 minutes each and we read together. I have found that the majority of my grade 5s and 6s just need more practice with a book in front of them to become more confident readers. Some of the grade 9 students have even become interested in helping out, so a few of them come and read with the younger kids as well. I have the most fun in the clubs. It gives me so much joy to see the students connecting the dots and slowly but surely getting better. And although teaching these large, multi-level classes is exhausting and often disheartening, I take solace in the small breakthroughs. I also am grateful for my co-teachers who may not always see eye to eye with me on teaching methods (ie our differing views on the use of corporal punishment) but work with me to give our students the support they need to be successful.
Term 1 came to a close in early April, and 5 PCV friends and I spent a large portion of the month long holiday traveling. First we went to Eastern Province (a two day journey by bus) and got to spend the night with our friend Sophie in her village. It was eye opening to see how different life is in Eastern. Northern Province is inhabited by the Bemba tribe, whereas the Chichewa people live in Eastern. This means that there is an almost entirely different culture in that region of the country. The language is completely different, as well as the physical set up of villages and the traditional community practices. Everyone in her village lives much closer together with lots of communal space. As soon as we arrived, the kids came over and stared at us (typical), so we played with them all evening and eventually they decided to demonstrate one of their traditional dances centered around warding off spirits. It was all fun and games done by kids who had not quite finished going through their training and their rituals to become true embodiments of the spirits in the dance, so all of us including their parents were laughing and having a fun time. We ate nshima with Sophie’s host family, and enjoyed seeing another side of our host country.
We spent the next two-ish weeks traveling around Malawi, spending time relaxing on the beach of one of the Great Lakes of Africa, hanging out with hippos, and hiking around the mountainous southern region. We even had the chance to spend the night with my mom’s roommate from her Peace Corps Pre-Service Training in the 90s! Patti now works for Peace Corps Malawi and kindly hosted us in the capital on our last night of vacation. It was wonderful to think about where we will all end up 30+ years from now and how our friendships will continue beyond this experience.
Immediately following our vacation in Malawi, Cailyn and I raced back to Northern Province to host 6 new agriculture trainees who would be moving here in June after their Swearing In. They stayed at Cailyn’s site for a night for training, they got to see the Prov House and Kasama, and then they moved on to see their own sites for the first time. We had so much fun getting to know them and showing them around as best as we could.
Around this time, Peace Corps at large was beginning to gain a better understanding for how policy changes surrounding HIV work affected us. So we returned back to Lusaka to do a week long HIV Training. The month of April was filled with travel and friends, and by the time the HIV Training came to a close, I was grateful to be able to settle back into my village.
May came and passed peacefully, with tearful goodbyes to PCV friends who had completed their service, and a return to school to teach for Term 2. In May my community work and relationships flourished, and I found myself deeply enjoying life in the village. I trained for the upcoming half marathon I had signed up for, and overall felt like I had finally truly adjusted to my life here. I started working on projects, including a mural of a world map on the wall of my school. I had realized through my conversations with students and teachers, that most of my students could not find Zambia on a map. They do not have atlas’ or in depth geography classes and so they were not able to conceptualize their physical place in the world. After discussing this with co-teachers, we decided to work together to paint a world map on the wall. We started this in May, and I can now happily say that with only a few more countries left to paint, nearly everyone in my community can find themselves on the map. While this may not be anything groundbreaking or life changing, it was a fun project that meant a lot to the students, teachers, and community at large.
In June, the new volunteers swore in and we continued the tradition of taking them to Chishimba Falls and helping them with their shopping for their houses. In June I also took Remi to the vet to finally get him neutered – and thankfully that surgery was a success with minimal complications. I met with village Headmen to discuss future projects, got involved in community meetings, and ate lots of nshima with my village friends and resource family. My school also launched a feeding program, partnering with an NGO to provide free, healthy breakfast every day to each student. I worked to overcome a knee injury as I continued training for the looming half marathon, and I found myself beginning to think about what is in store for me after this experience ends.
On July 6th, I ran my first half marathon in none other than Victoria Falls. My knee did not hurt too badly, and I got to see the largest, most beautiful waterfall in the world. I was in awe of its enormity. Cailyn, Hayes, and I all travelled down together, and Hayes’ step mom even ran the race with us. Now we find ourselves searching for our next run to train for – once my knee is back to normal.
I truly cannot express how insane it feels to be coming up on one year living in Zambia. In some ways, I feel panicked that so much time has already passed and there’s still so much more I want to do and relationships I want to strengthen. It feels like it will all pass within the blink of an eye and that I will leave unsatisfied. Other times, it scares me to think that I am still not even halfway through and yet I have already been here for so long. It can feel daunting that I still have so much time left, and I wonder how I will make it through. If I think too much about the future, I get overwhelmed. So, I try as hard as I can to live each moment truthfully. Allowing myself to be frustrated at the constant state of being watched by curious onlookers, even though I know it does not come from a malicious place. Being okay with feeling briefly annoyed at unsympathetic comments due to intercultural misunderstanding from strangers or friends. Letting myself feel down when things get hard and I feel isolated. I have found myself journaling more than I ever have in my life. I have read dozens of books, listened to countless podcasts, and made too many new spotify playlists. I also have rediscovered my love for running and healthy excercise. At the prov house, we often cook together, trying out new recipes. And in the village, I frequently experiment with the ingredients I have available to me. I have embarked on ambitious sewing projects and I hope to get into knitting soon if I can. During CE, I worked hard to make my house feel like home through thoughtful decoration (including making my own shelving!) and I now have a sanctuary where, through the highs and lows, I feel comfortable to experience it all.
As I continue moving through my time here, I am excited to discover more about both my host community and myself. I hope I continue to find new ways to learn, connect, and stay present. But above all else, I want to take as few 14 hour bus rides as I possibly can. Those suck.
